Finding Our Purpose – 6.15.15

When I was little, I wanted to be a gymnast. After all, I knew how to do a one-handed cartwheel and I liked wearing colorful leotards. But when I realized I probably wouldn’t be able to make much money doing somersaults, I decided to be an accountant. I might not have been amazing with math, but I’d get absolutely giddy working with graph paper… all those boxes, organization, the neatness of numbers in different columns matching… it still excites me more than I should admit. As a teenager, I also loved the idea of doing the chalk drawings at Wegmans grocery store, and scooping ice cream at our favorite custard shop, Anderson’s. Sadly, however, neither of those places wanted to hire a girl whose family wouldn’t let her work on Sundays.

Still, the question remained: what am I going to do for the rest of my life? What on earth was I created for? Is what I’m doing making a difference? How is that even measured? Who in the world cares if I’m scooping ice cream? Cleaning houses? Teaching piano lessons? Babysitting? Does this even matter? What on earth was I even created for?

Each of us ask these questions from time to time. And for those graduating this time of year, they’re getting bombarded with them. We are born with a desire to know. To learn and fulfill. We want to chase after our dreams and fulfill the reason we were born.

As a Christian, I know that each of us were created with a purpose. A mission. Sometimes, our purpose changes with time. It might be related to the set of skills that God gave us. Or perhaps it has to do with the situation God brought us out of, or a place we found ourselves. Sometimes, it’s something that had been pulled out over a period of time. Other times, it was something that was born out of nowhere. It can come out of success and from tragedy. Some people strive their whole life to work toward their goals while others die without ever knowing why they were born. Our stories are as unique as our fingerprints.

But we all need to know.

Since I lost my son, I find myself determined to stay focused. To not let myself get sucked into the vortex of pity, self-destruction, and depression. Because it happens all too easily. I have to plan times to grieve, to cry, remember, and hurt. To let my tears sting my face and feel the pit of loss in my gut. And then I wipe my tears and keep going.

Do you know why?

Because I have a purpose.

I may never get into a cute colorful leotard again. You’re welcome. I may never get paid to use my teaching degree. And that’s okay. Because my purpose is being worked out every single day.

I am a mom.



Even with my emotional scars, I have a reason to move on: to care for the three kids I have been charged with here on earth. To teach them. Guide them. Show them love. Discipline. Encouragement. And spur them onto Christ. That. That is why I keep going. I believe that is the reason I was born. The reason I still have air in my lungs.

Linda is a friend of mine has a six-year-old daughter that was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes when she was very young. It is a condition that outlines every bit of their day. Both girls have seen more than their fair share of blood, needles, pumps, and heartache.

When her daughter was first diagnosed, Linda was sent into a tailspin of “Why me? Why me?” She knew a bit of the challenges she’d have to deal with and she wasn’t sure how she would manage it. Shortly after that diagnosis, she learned that her daughter also had Celiac Disease. Oh, how much can one person take? She understood the seriousness of this diagnosis, both of them. She knew her life would be forever altered.

But she didn’t give up, admit defeat, and throw her hands up in surrender. She turned her questions from “Why me?” to “Why NOT me? I can help her. I can care for her. She’s my child and I love her more than anything.” She acknowledged her fears, channeled her anger and became an advocate for T1D. She raises money for research with the hopes that they will find a cure. She rallies a big group of supporters to walk in the JDRF Walk every year. She organized a group of other T1D moms around Western New York to band together for support. She works hard to teach and educate her daughter in how to best manage things in case a cure is not found in her lifetime.

Linda discovered what her purpose was: to be a mom. And together with her husband, they were going to care to this beautiful little girl and her wonderful older brother.

People tell Linda that she’s an inspiration. But she refuses to see it that way. Her response: This is my daughter. I want her to live. So I will do absolutely anything I can to fight for her. “I’m not angered by it anymore. It is just part of our family,” she told me.

For so many reasons that seem so obvious now, Linda was chosen to be this amazingly spirited girl’s mom. And because of that, God has already given her everything she needs to parent her. This is not the way that she originally imagined. But she is determined to find joy.

Because she found her purpose.

Linda said, “I feel it’s so important for people to know it doesn’t have to be some big ‘thing.’ It can be something so small… and when you realize what IT is… Ahhh, it feels so good.”

I don’t know what God has for each one of us. Your life’s mission may be drastically different than mine and Linda’s. And that’s okay. In fact, that’s good! Everyone brings something different to the table. But what a joy it is when you get glimpses of God’s plan. To understand pieces of why He put you here, and that level of satisfaction in knowing you’re doing your best to fulfill your mission. Like Linda said, it feels so good.

When you come to a life-altering event, you have two choices: to give up or keep going. And if you choose the latter, you’d need to know why you’re getting out of bed each morning. What you’re willing to fight for. Trust God to light the way. He promises to make things clear in His time. You just need to be willing to take that next step.

I doubt that I’ll ever be able to do a one-handed cartwheel again. But I can change a mean diaper… administer the most effective BandAids… and my oldest thinks that my singing voice is absolutely beautiful. “Just like in the movies, I get sleepy when you sing to me at bedtime.”

Purpose. Makes all the difference.


  1. YVONNE says:

    Dear Mindy, thank you so much for being such an insperation in my life. Every thing you share, helps me understand the purpose of why I need Gods love. And even though I have raised 3 boys that have become young man now. God has given me another chance to raise another child which is my fourth. And it took many doctors appt by invitro to have him, but my husband and I wanted a child so very much. And I thank God every day for this blessing and for all my blessings. I still feel like there is more for me to be doing, I don.t think or should I say I don’t feel like I have fullfilled my purpose yet. I feel like there is so much in this world going on, if I could help every one I would. But that is not possible. I pray often, I try to donate when I can. You know I was present in the church that day, and the days that follwed after I could not stop thinking of you, your family and Ben. My heart now wants to take one negative and make it postive. And now, I drive by the sight in delware park,, cause I take that way to work every day. And I say a pray and send my love to all in heaven. I see a homeless man on the corner before I turn down the street to my work. And there are days I stop and hand him a doller, or sometimes $5, and he always says to me God bless you. My heart feels for him. I am still working my purpose, I know becoming a mother and a wife is one them, I still turning to God to find out more. Thank you again for sharing your love and faith.

  2. Terry says:

    I know Linda and know what a great mom she is. As a member of WNY Sugar Mommas, I know the challenges of being the mom of a Type 1 diabetic. Tonight I will need to check my son frequently as he is hyperglycemic and monitoring is needed. I do it gladly. Like Linda, I want my child to live, so I don’t mind losing sleep. I have high hopes for my child just like the mothers who understand our first mission is the children entrusted to us by God. I have grieved for your loss and followed your blog for over a year. Thank you for showing how our lives aren’t easier once we become Christ followers, but how Christians deal with the tragedies and triumphs that occur in our lives. I prayed for my son tonight as his blood sugars climbed and the dangerous ketones showed in testing. He will be fine, no matter what occurs, because he is not mine and I am not alone. He is God’s and God, and the God-sent sugar mommas, are here to support each of us through our trials.

  3. Karen Seggio says:

    I am a Grandma. I raised 2 boys, always believing in God, in Jesus but without the personal relationship and heart knowledge. When I became a Christian my boys were adults and oh, how I longed to have those years back to share Him, to expose them to the Truth. But then I realized that it is never too late; we are never too old. I live to share Jesus, to be the best reflection of his Love that I can be. That “small” purpose may be appear to be small when we aren’t out there affecting masses of people; but our purpose is to grow personally in our wisdom and knowledge of our awesome Father through His Son and to be a reflection of His Love whether to the masses or the few. God will decide that and bring to us those He chooses to love and reveal Himself through us. Our purpose is to look for and recognize each day what He is doing all around us and join Him in His great plan an purpose. I can still be a reflection of that Love to my boys He blessed me with and now I have granddaughters; and I live to share Jesus with them and whoever else God chooses to bring to me. I’ve realized age doesn’t matter. What we do with our time here once we find the heart knowledge is all that matters. You have a gift of words that inspire. Continue to profess Truth, to share your pain and your victories. You are more than a mom. You are a child of a King and He has to be so pleased with you. He feels your pain and He wraps His arms around you. As we read your blogs, we also feel your pain. But oh, Mindy, our hearts feel the victory of your standing firm in your faith through it all. And I am personally grateful to know you through these blogs. What a gift God has given you – gift of words, of faith and wisdom and such a great love for Him in the midst of all your circumstances..He will continue to “take you through” and bring a great witnessing of Victory because you are His faithful servant – you and Andy although he doesn’t write, I feel him standing right along side of you. May God Bless you and your family as you bless others.

  4. Cheryl H. says:

    Mindy, this could not have come at a better time. I have been struggling or wondering what my next step is in life. I have been at my job a long time and changes have been made within the last few months and I don’t think its for the good and I have come to a crossroads – should I stay or should I move on. The thought of starting over and not knowing what you are going to get just panicks me. I feel I have a purpose to make a difference somewhere though. Thank you for the encouraging words. You are such an inspiration.

  5. Frances says:

    Mindy, I have been following your story since shortly after Ben was diagnosed. You truly bless me with your strong faith, openness and honesty, and the joy you seek as you live your life. I look forward to your blog and I am so thankful you continue to write and share! Today’s message is so perfect! Thank you! Love to your precious family!

  6. Jessie says:

    Your voice is so loud & strong to me. When you speak, I’m all ears. It’s because of your testimony after the loss of Ben…because I see that God is in you & all around you. His love & comfort are evident in your life. Thank you for still speaking to us. For not shutting down. God’s purpose for you is to be an awesome mom but I think it even goes beyond that…I think He has given you the purpose of speaking to all of us “strangers” on the other side of your computer screen. A purpose to encourage, to make us laugh & to make us cry. You encourage me. I look forward to your blog. I always read it with anticipation. Thank you for being a light in a very dark world…
    Jessie in NC

  7. Hannah Guillory says:

    Dear Mindy,

    Thank you for these perspective-focusing words this morning. I’ve often found myself wondering if I shouldn’t have gotten my teaching degree, if that very hard year in NYC earning my MA in a crazy-paced fast track program was at all worth it, all with the uneasy sense that my busy days should be more purposeful.

    Thank you for the reminder that being a mama to my two little ones IS a purpose in and of itself.

  8. Jan says:

    Hi Mindy, our family attends EHWC so I know your family. I can still remember when you and your husband started attending the Sunday services and watching your beautiful family grow.
    I have follow your blogs and admire your courage with in all you guys have been through. It encourages me and helps with the situation we our in concerning our Granddaughter. Their are days I feel like God isn’t listening.(I know He is) I wonder if you would pray for us concerning this situation. Thank you for your postings and courage.

  9. Theresa says:

    Thank you for your empowering words. At a time when “Mom” can mean so many things and some times we feel that it is not enough, your words help me refocus my purpose and calling. I’ve got kids to raise so they can become warriors that change the world!

  10. Deborah Smith says:

    Mindy, please don’t ever forget you have a ministry that God has given you. To teach others his love and blessings,

  11. Christine says:

    I missed this post on June 15th, and it just showed up in my FB newsfeed. Perfect timing as i am about to haul my family to Columbus, Ohio for a week long medical evaluation for Mei Li. I don’t know what the outcome will be, what the doctors will suggest…and I am nervous. But….God led us all the way to China, to find this sweet girl and make her part of our family. It’s a great honor that he trusts us to care for her, help her, raise her, love her. You post reminded me that this is my purpose….and I need to pass the reigns back to Him. Ahhhhh….feels so good! 😉

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